Sunday, February 12, 2012

Awkward compliment

When I'm using a urinal I'm sure to keep my eyes fixed firmly ahead. After all there is an unwritten contract amongst all males that they will stare intently at the tiles in front of them for the thirty seconds it takes before a short shake and careful repackaging of the equipment. Your eyes should really not be roaming at any point during this procedure.

That's why it was particularly weird the other day when I was taking a piss and a guy complimented me on my watch. It's bad enough that he broke the unwritten contract but then to bring attention to the fact that he was gazing at a spot just centimetres from my exposed wang made me really uncomfortable.

Sunday, February 5, 2012


I want to have long hair just so I can cut it all off. When you start with a crew cut there is just not much room for dramatic change.


Today I had a long term client call me Jeremy. I din't correct her the first time because she was in the full flight of saying something else. She kept calling me Jeremy and I could not really be bothered to correct her because it was relatively close and after the tenth time it would have just been really awkward. I wonder if she's getting alzheimers or if I'm just not very memorable?