Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Walking sucks

Race walking is about the most pathetic sport there is. People can’t help but laugh at men who wiggle there arse in such a way. Today, using a normal gait, I walked past a guy who was doing a slow race walk – he had all of the wiggling, just none of the forward momentum. I thought he might be humiliated by this but anyone who race walks obviously has a high humiliation threshold.

It seems obvious that the Olympics should replace race walking with hopping. There could be a straight-out endurance race where the person who hops the longest distance without putting their foot down wins. There could also be an extreme hopping event where competitors have to negotiate an obstacle course without putting their foot down. 

The athletes would be like Rodger Federer, just instead of having arms of unequal size, they would have one massive leg. I'd be impressed by the freakishness and the prospect of seeing people fall over always makes a sport far more watchable. 

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