The announcement of the election really got me thinking about how I could create a political ad which doesn't suck.
As much as I hate Julia, I hate Tony even more, in particular his stupid policies to repeal the carbon tax and mining tax. Basically it is just giving taking revenue from the government coffers and giving it back to billionaire mining interests (most of them foreign).
I imagine Thunderbirds/Team America style puppets being used for the advertisements. For each ad Tony Abbott would rock up to the billionaires' club (probably dressed in his speedos) to deliver the dosh. He would then ask them how they are going to use that money.
Tony: So Gina how are you going to use these billions I've liberated from the Australian public?
Gina: I'm going to buy lots of pies.
Tony: But pies are cheap. Maybe you should give some to your family?
Gina: You're funny Tony.
Tony: You could always just expand your media interests until you are like Berlusconi?
Gina: I'm also going to buy some sauce.
At this point Gina would just lift her leg and let rip with a massive fart.
Voiceover: Want your tax payer dollars going to a billionaire? Vote for the Coalition.
I think it gets a point enough and it is low brow enough that it would connect with the bogans everyone is so desperate to win over.
I would also like to see a version with a Chinese billionaire who just insults Tony in Mandarin.
While Tony is fawning over him (possibly feeding him grapes) he would say things such as:
I love that you are so stupid Tony - you give all your country's money to me. How funny that you walk like you just got off a horse. I love your speedos - is that a budgie you are trying to smuggle or a hummingbird?
The possibilities are endless.