Friday, August 6, 2010

Frickin smoke alarms

Happily drunk and fast asleep in a warm bed with fresh sheets. It was just how it should be at 4am on Saturday morning. But then the frickin smoke alarm started stabbing at my brain. "My battery is dying, my battery is dying, come fix me, come fix me". Every ten minutes the bastard started screaming at me like some annoying child (seriously how do parents deal with that crap). Eventually I had to drag myself out of my cosy bed, balance on a chair and rip the annoying bastard off the ceiling.

This led me to think, there are probably fewer people that die from house fires than die from falling off ladders while attempting to quiet the screech of smoke alarms in a half-awake drunken state.

Those that do die from house fires are normally:
(a) people who smoke in bed - if you are that addicted to smoking chances are you going to die pretty soon anyway.
(b) people with alzheimers who forgot they left all the highly combustible stuff next to a dodgy fifty year old heater - again likely to die pretty soon anyway.
(c) people who deep fry a lot of stuff - if you cook a lot of chips and are too fat to outrun a kitchen fire you are no doubt due for a massive heart attack.

Is the life saving potential of this device really worth it destroying my sleep? Possibly, but is it worth it destroying the peace and quiet every time I cook a steak? I'm not rushing straight out for a new battery...

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