Sunday, July 20, 2014

Kill all smooth peanut butter eaters

If I were very wealthy I would start a campaign to demonise all smooth peanut butter eaters. I'd say all sorts of bad shit about them. For example - Smooth peanut butter eaters also eat babies. Smooth peanut butter eaters have weapons of mass destruction. Smooth peanut butter eaters rape you and give you AIDS.

I would warn all those good crunchy peanut butter eaters about this insidious opposing group and all the evils they are responsible for. I would start an army that goes door to door and rips apart kitchens in search of jars of smooth peanut butter. The army would tie people up and force feed them peanut butter until they dobbed in others.

Hopefully with this ridiculousness I would make my point and people would make the cognitive leap which has so far not been made in every war zone currently festering.

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